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Modern Love

Lawyers handling the estate of David Bowie have set a date of May 4 for anyone claiming to be a child of Bowie’s or a creditor of his estate to file a claim. The “child” part is important because the allegedly once bi-sexual Bowie left 1/4 of his estate to each of his two acknowledged children and half to his wife. The issue is that Bowie claimed to have been “incredibly promiscuous” during the 70’s and 80’s. His romances are alleged to have included Mick Jagger’s former girlfriend (Marianne Faithfull), Mick’s ex-wife (Bianca), Mick himself, Susan Sarandon, Charlie Chaplin’s widow (Oona O’Neill), and Slash’s mom. And your childhood best friend’s mom. Or dad.
Several brief points:
 
1. Under Ohio law (and Bowie would be the last person to claim residence in Ohio), creditors have six months from the date of death to file a claim against the estate for money owed by the decedent.
 
2. Illegitimate children generally can only claim from their dad’s estate if they were acknowledged by the decedent or if the child proves paternity after the death of the decedent.
 
3. In drafting estate documents for the Thin White Duke, it would have been best to specifically name the children rather than use the term “my child” which opens the door for illegitimate children to inherit.
 
4. The good part of May-December romances (i.e. Oona O’Neill) or bi-sexual couplings (yeah, we are looking at you, Mick), is that paternity is not a concern.
 
5. Bowie definitely knew about the power of charm, but he never let love walk on by.
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Two Words, George. Pre-Nup.

amber heard
Johnny Depp and Amber Heard settled their divorce case this week for $7 million which Heard has pledged to charity. She had reportedly been seeking spousal support and half of his net worth as a result of their 15 month marriage. During the proceedings, Heard alleged that Depp had abused her. The couple did not have a pre-nuptial agreement.
 
Several brief points:
 
1. Depp should have insisted on a pre-nuptial agreement which could have provided that he owed Heard nothing in the event of a divorce.
 
2. The absence of a pre-nup does not entitle Heard to half of Depp’s net worth, but only to what he earned during their 15 month marriage.
 
3. Anyone making bets on the length of a marriage between a hard partying heterosexual male and a declared bi-sexual woman 20 years younger than him should always take the under.
 
4. I have long told Janice that her crush on Depp was misplaced. I might finally be vindicated for that opinion.

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I am an attorney located in Cincinnati, Ohio who practices in the areas of estate planning, probate, asset protection, and small business advice. I make a difficult and bewildering process as simple as possible. Most importantly, I provide "more for less" for my clients.